Until the society, regardless of how rich it may be, sincerely cares for its people from disadvantaged situations it would always remain as a calluous capitalistic society with a big military budget.

... is it worth it anymore?

Was a passionate courtship... giving unconditionally without the need of reciprocity. Now, a weary union that is chaining the desire to end it all.

simply priceless....

the best thing one can get after a hard day of work is to come home to this: -

now... more ammunition for my 'agenda'...

thanks anna for the video clip... this is a classic one. Btw... stop telling others that you miss me at work cos' I eat and play with you. Now, they might start thinking that they paid for a huge slacker all those years...

Our future child

Wife saw picture attachment from Jo. She now has a simple request if I want a child in our lives. I only have to do one thing to our child if she is ever going to give me a baby....

I bet wife would schedule this 'grooming' as one of our child's enrichment classes.

My Birthday

I never thought Birthdays were great... maybe never into all those kinds of "hey surprise, happy birthday" thing. Ehh...then again... I have to quickly contradict myself at this point though... There are 2 birthday memories coming into my mind at this moment, as I am writing. The first when I was about 12 years, family was into a relative poverty kind of situation thing. Yet my parents gave me some $ to treat my friends with some KFC. I vaguely remember brother was there too... Not sure why I remember this memory... has to do a Freudian thing to unearth some past issues... real dark issues or maybe some unresolved guilt that I spent those precious $ on some battered chickens.

Then there was that birthday, which happened last year. The CDC little girls surprised me with a birthday cake. Can't really remember the details but that was a good feeling. I remember that it was a choc cake. Kind of nice that they did it... hmmm... really cannot remember exactly what happened... maybe there are some PTSD thing involved with that birthday episode that I am still blocking my cognition from reliving those traumatic memories.

This birthday.... full of anger. My work is never all so happy-happy; hence it is ok I accept it. Then some of the bday wishes I got simply triggered me!!! First of all, the CDC girls except the only innocent one, Amelia & Jeanette who is up North (if not she is likely to join in) seemed to be waiting for this day to happen. So happily in the morning, smelly Fish Head messaged:" Hey, Happy Birthday! You're old now. So old. Ha... Stay childish and annoying". Fair... I can take it like a man. Then, like some coordinated assault, Jo went:"HAPPY BIRTHDAY old man!".

Any recent illusion of me being young because of the presence of my zits (from work stress), was simply blew off like the flame on the birthday candles. Then Miss Jo with her (un)consciousness, "hahaha... Still young at heart right....Uncle..." Before that, I messaged Fish Head:"Shut up! I m not old! I was simply born earlier" and that smelly Fish Head replied:" Er ya. Very much earlier". With all those callous assaults on me, Miss Jo made it looked as if I was the fault by ending her 'well-intended' bday greetings by messaging, "...have a good day! Dont be so grouchy la...Monday morning. birthday leh..."

By then, I wanted to smash the phone at the computer screen. Yeah, it was Monday morning. For a start, I was not having any blues knowing that it was going to be a heavy work day... I was grouchy because of the whole emphasis on the 'age thing'. Blood oozing out of my mouth as I am typing...

Later in the day, I went to a neighbourhood near my place to do some work so I kind of got to go home without being caught among the tussle of the traffic. For once, I thought Birthday guy does have something good happening to him. Then, like she knew I was happy for once today, Miss Cheng wasted her $ to message me this:"Yo lao pei pei! Happy 99th bdae Hahaha....." Hmmm.... Sometimes, I suspect (being paranoid here) they have got some kind of satelite up there just to rub it in on me.

Got home... went Internet; Facebook. "Happy **th Birthday..." from Hayati. Thanks Hayati... my facebook does not only have 1 friend - Miss Hayati. I got many many many friends. Had dinner at home, cos' not someone who wants to celebrate my birthday. Parents got me a cake.. well thanks... though I kind of suspected it was dad's scheme to load himself with more sugar. The blockbuster part was when my mother exclaimed to me:"I got you a pink coloured cake... so nice hor." Ok... not fighting for popularity... but mum... PINK IS YOUR DAUGHTER-IN-LAW'S COLOUR!!! NOT MINE!!! ARE YOU BUYING A CAKE FOR MY WIFE OR FOR ME??? Never mind...composed myself... before I could zen out reminding myself that I never bother about bday things... my dearest wife was happily covering the cake with candles while I politely told her that I was not that old after all...like she cares about my feelings.

Well... today is my bday... Again, not that I am bothered that it is my bday cos' I am never into celebrating it. Somehow... it has become my bday cos' I am feeling that I have become an object for mockery with 'age' being the theme.

Anyway...breath in - breath out. For every grey skies, there is a silver lining. The glass is half full or half empty depending on how one sees it... There have been WELL-INTENDED greetings after all. Always great to receive those greetings since they are from friends who I hardly get to meet nowadays due to our various commitments.

..... a great day.

The Cane

I was in Yishun neighbourhood ('old school neighbourhood') when I saw one of the most historical mechanisms for disciplining a child (or even a dog) - the CANE.

A thought flashed in my mind, invoking a disbelief that there are adults who believe "Spare the rod; spoil the child"....

I just cannot accept the above statement whenever an adult believe that it is necessary to cane a child be it mildly or wildly lashing it out on the child. I always believe that the adult who states the above statement as being total incompetent; one who has their own expectation(s); one who has unresolved issues and/or being lazy to rationale with a child whenever they use the rod.

It could as simple as the child saying:" I do not want to eat the peas" The adult feels their cooking is not being appreciated...LASH! "I want to buy Wii" The adult remembers that the child did not perform well in their Mathematics....SLAP!!! Then the adult would expect the child to internalise the adult's message; learn to accept the punishment; to 'automatically' do what the adult wants the child to do in future and to identify who's the BOSS. This would probably save them the effort of rationalising with the child or for the adult to notice their own faults that maybe their peas do suck after all.

To nuture a child is a huge Life project. It is dealing with a human being who has their own behaviourals that often differ from the adult's own expectations. And of course, it is without doubt, exhausting when nuturing a child and disappointing when one's child does not sit by the table to finish their meals or does not score direct As for their examinations. It is even more difficult when adults have to take on the responsibilities and duties of parenting when they are already usually physically and emotionally taxed after a long lousy day at work.

But it is not an excuse to bring home all the shits that the adult faces in the society on the child. Children have their own worlds too. They do not mean to 'lie', to be 'lazy' or to be 'stupid'. The child is young, developing to understand the world that we, adults, have lived long in and we, the adults, who have formed the 'worlds' from our own ideas/ expectations on them. Probably, the child might lie or lose interest in their studies in future. Then, have the adult's actions on the child resulted in such behaviourals in the first place?


Probably, I am not a father (yet... until my wife grants me the work permit); hence I am unable to fully comprehend the tedious efforts of being a parent. Even so, I really do not see how physical punishment would help the child in the long run? Physical punishment takes away the child's ability to rationalise and could result in them to 'behave' for the fear of being hit again. To physically punish the child also means that the adult is no longer nuturing a child, rather the adult is teaching the child to hit others when their expectations are not being met.

Really, there is no research in this society, which constantly for seek evidence-based practices, that caning does help to nuture a child. One thing I am pretty sure though is that caning is an action by the adult to help cope with their own inadequacies.

C'mon adults... do not buy the canes I saw at the Yishun neighbourhood... Give the child a break... the child has the potential (maybe not the next President or billionaire) but for sure the child has the potential to create something good to this world. Go on, attend some parenting courses; talk to someone about your shitty day or work out how the child's and your own expectations can happen together somehow or the other. These are not wussy actions; hitting the child is. Please, there are so much an adult-child relationship can nuture into and to benefit the child ... not the cane.

The one thing I would miss

If I die tomorrow, it shall not be the million stars that greeted me in the Australia outback. If I die tomorrow, it shall not be the sun that baked on me. If I die tomorrow, it shall not be my habits that I would miss.

If I die tomorrow, I shall miss my wife. We were driving home after an uneventful dinner tonight. The radio was playing to the station of FM 93.3 instead of my choices. I usually would want to put on 'Passion' but your honour would judge it simply invalid to the ears/ sanity. Nevertheless, all was cool and compromising as some old songs of my era were played. It probably does pay to listen to thy wife at times, as the old songs allowed us to speak about times then and how 'unfashionable' those songs are now. It somehow sparkled laughter into our space and it allowed me to chill from the stressful working week that I was having.

Such are these moments that I have never regretted marrying her. And these are the little moments that I know the one thing I would miss if I die tomorrow is my wife.

What appeared to be an innocent question...

I vaguely recall during my university days, I studied the methods of propaganda. One of the most commonly used methods (I cannot remember what the term was) is to ask a seemingly innocent question to the masses; to appeal to their affective and for them to agree with the person. I believe all politicans do use this method; whatever their ideologies are. Of course, the most infamous politician who was a huge fan of deploying such propaganda method was no other than Hilter in rising his Third Reich.

In recent times, such underhanded method was observed to be used by commoners. One such commoner, 'Natsumi' is a fave of such underhanded method to exploit for her desires. She asked a seemingly innocent question at http://natsumizblog.blogspot.com/ dated May 28, 2008. To further enhance her propaganda, she used pictures as forms of visual materials to capture the masses' cognition that she is indeed 'suffering'; thus thinking that she could draw supporters to her peculiar ideology.

Much as I do really like to maintain my critical thinking position and to analyse her perspectives.... I must admit I have been deeply disturbed by her method and can no longer withhold my intended calmness and attempts to rationalise with your truly... YOU HAVE SO MANY MORE BAGS THAN WHAT YOU HAVE SHOWN ON YOUR BLOG!!! I KNOW THEY ARE NO 'CHANNEL'; 'LB' OR 'DOORS' BUT U DO HAVE MANY MANY BAGS THAT SHOULD SUFFICE YOU FOR LIFE!!! DON'T TELL ME GUYS DO NOT UNDERSTAND GIRLS' 'NEEDS'!!! FOR THIS GUY IS CRACKING HIS MIND AS TO HOW HE CAN FIND SPACE FOR ALL YOUR BAGS!!!

With this outburst, I have lost my ability to analyse her position and of course I do not have no empathy whatsoever for her 'needs'. I rest my case... attempting to return to my zen state....

P.s... I still very much love you.